Lessons of Life

There are only a few things i've learned in life and I feel i should share them with you all.
1. Never get caught. If you don't get in trouble you didn't do anything wrong.
2. Never spray air freshner on any part of your body. Even as a joke it burns like hell.
3. Avoid the clap (from a league of their own) always good advice.
4. Never actually smoke rope. You will get a lung infection, not a good thing.
5. If you are at a party and someone offers you something and you have to ask what it is, you don't want to know.
6. Credit cards are not your friend.
7. Guys in bands get chicks, it doesn't even have to be a good band, just act like you can play and instrament and you are in.
8. Never go to a strip club with a credit card.
9. When taking medicine always know the diffrence between a tablespoon and a teaspoon.
10. Don't hate, you always become what you hate.
11. Stick up for the kid being picked on, he's gonna end up the rich one later in life.
12. Life is short, way too short, don't worry so much. If worrying won't fix it don't worry.
13. Don't be shy, your opinion matters. It's hard to beleive but i used to be very shy.
14. Look past the little annoying things about people and see all the good things.
15. Only 1% of the world are a$$ h0les, but 99% of the world refuses to come out of their houses and leaves me alone with the 1%
16. The more you try to figure out life the less it will make sence.
17. Tom Cruise is a good actor, but he is clinically insaine.
18. Never date a girl who is more interested in kissing your roommates girlfreind more than you. She is probably not serious about you.
19. As they say clowns do eat people.
20. Money can't buy happyness, but being broke doesn't make you happy either.